Coffeetable Romantic Interlude

Who says you need a tablecloth, or even a table to have a romantic dinner?

Pickup or have takeout food delivered. Whether Chinese, India, Mexican or Italian, have someone else make dinner for you to eat at home.

Light candles, if you’d like, and eat dinner – at the coffee table.

Here’s what makes this a great Romantic Interlude.

  • It’s informal, relaxing.
  • It’s unusual and fun.
  • It’s more intimate.

Eating at a coffee table leaves everyone less anxious about having the “right” food for the Interlude. The laidback atmosphere allows for easygoing conversation. And the bizarreness leads to more laughter.

Be adventurous.  Create a memorable evening for the two of you.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you credit the source. Thank you.

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From Date Night to Romantic Interlude

Date Night.

Have you ever heard or read, “every couple should have a weekly date night”?  You probably have.

When you hear or read those two words (“date night”), what do you think about and how do you feel?

  • It turns into, “What do you want to do?” “I don’t know. What would you like to do?”
  • It’s a boring routine: a trip to the same restaurant, eating the same lousy food in a silence broken only by an occasional family feud?
  • Or, the pressure’s on and I’ve got to come up with a great idea, every single w-e-e-k.

I hope date night isn’t missing from your relationship. But if it is, here are a couple ways to develop an active “date night” and keep your Romance Alive.

Date nights don’t just happen by themselves. It takes more than acknowledgment this is a great idea. You’ll need to invest time looking for date night ideas.

  • Check out the local listings for things-to-do or new restaurants in the area.
  • Listen to your sweetheart’s comments on places she/he’d like to go or things to try.
  • Ask friends for suggestions.

Once you’ve collected some ideas, take action. Make plans. Set a date. Get the sitter if needed. Walk out of the house. Make “date night” a reality.

(Hmm. Time and Action. Sounds like something from the Romance Triangle. But I digress.)

If you, like so many, believe your creative ideas for “date nights” are on holiday, surfs up. Search for “date night ideas” or “dates he likes”, “dates she likes”. Place your personal stamp on the ideas you encounter, and you will turn these date night ideas into Romantic Interludes.

A little time and effort, a little research plus action and voilà, you’ll create regular Romantic Interlude “date nights”.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you credit the source.

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First Date Memories

When and where was the first dinner date with your sweetheart? Remember? Maybe not the exact date, but the location and month?

Take your sweetheart to dinner at the same restaurant again.

While this in itself might be romantic, let’s add a bit more and make it a memorable Romantic Interlude.

Research events that happened on the same day or in the month of your first date. Create a list of ten memorable things which were happening at that time – “Momentous Events of (date)”. The last item on the list, add something like “Our First Date”.

Give your sweetheart the list and add a ring or pendant with that month’s gemstone.

That’ll build a memory.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you credit the source.

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The Romance of Boldness

Two weeks to our anniversary. I wasn’t sure the Romantic Interlude I’d planned would work.

The Geronics were playing at The Strand and I was building an anniversary evening around dinner and their concert.

No worries about dinner. We loved Mexican and Costa del Sol was the venue for our first date 3 years ago. But the Geronics were the wildcard.

After that first dinner, I’d taken her to a small venue, the Train Depot, to hear the Geronics. She hadn’t been impressed.

Honestly, the band wasn’t very good back then. Their lead singer seemed tone deaf, the keyboardist a Liberace wannabe. But in 3 years they’d become a great regional band.

But – would she enjoy the evening? Would it create a good anniversary memory? What if she hated them – again?

When you find yourself in such a situation, your attitude decides the success or failure of the Romantic Interlude.

You see, confidence is an attractive quality. Someone living confidently attracts people like smartphones entices kids. Acting decisively, stating your intentions with assurance, gets your sweetheart attention.

This isn’t arrogance. That’s repulsive.

Arrogant people:

  • Act superior to all others. They condescend to allow your presence.
  • They’re the star and there’s no room for others’ successes.

Confident people:

  • Believe in themselves, knowing their strengths and accepting their weaknesses.
  • They fearlessly make room for others in their life to be successful.

Sometimes we don’t feel confident. That’s human. Sometimes you feel tentative – like I did with the anniversary Interlude. But when you feel uncertain, do what I did. I bought the tickets, made the reservations and invited my sweetheart to a surprise anniversary date.

That evening I acted decisively, calmly and fearlessly telling her the plans for the evening. I acted confidently. The results? A memorable Romantic Interlude.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you credit the source.

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Upset the Conversation for Romance

Conversations in long term relationships can become predictable and stale. When you talk, the conversation often devolves into work, politics and bills.

Now, before that next quiet conversation, make a list of 5 bizarre questions to ask your sweetheart.

Some examples:

  • What superpower would you like to have?
  • What was the last song that got stuck in your head?
  • If you were going to sweep me off my feet and there were no limitations, what would you do and where would we go?”

This Romantic Interlude is about asking something so startling it jars the conversation out of the rut. Be creative, unpredictable. Have fun.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to share this blog or share the contents of this blog provided you credit the source.

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Are You A Happy Romantic?

Date Night.

Have you ever heard or read, “every couple should have a weekly date night”?  You probably have.

When you hear or read those two words (“date night”), what do you think about and how do you feel?

  • It turns into, “What do you want to do?” “I don’t know. What would you like to do?”
  • It’s a boring routine: a trip to the same restaurant, eating the same lousy food in a silence broken only by an occasional family feud?
  • Or, the pressure’s on and I’ve got to come up with a great idea, every single w-e-e-k.

I hope date night isn’t missing from your relationship. But if it is, here are a couple ways to develop an active “date night” and keep your Romance Alive.

Date nights don’t just happen by themselves. It takes more than acknowledgment this is a great idea. You’ll need to invest time looking for date night ideas.

  • Check out the local listings for things-to-do or new restaurants in the area.
  • Listen to your sweetheart’s comments on places she/he’d like to go or things to try.
  • Ask friends for suggestions.

Once you’ve collected some ideas, take action. Make plans. Set a date. Get the sitter if needed. Walk out of the house. Make “date night” a reality.

(Hmm. Time and Action. Sounds like something from the Romance Triangle. But I digress.)

If you, like so many, believe your creative ideas for “date nights” are on holiday, surfs up. Search for “date night ideas” or “dates he likes”, “dates she likes”. Place your personal stamp on the ideas you encounter, and you will turn these date night ideas into Romantic Interludes.

A little time and effort, a little research plus action and voilà, you’ll create regular Romantic Interlude “date nights”.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from this blog or share its contents provided you credit the source.

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Be Prepared For The Unexpected Romantic Interlude

Instead of creating a Romantic Interlude, create a plan for an opportune moment.

Life is hard. Some days suck the life out of you. You get home and don’t have the desire to think about dinner or anything else. You know what I mean?

Next time your sweetheart comes to the end of her/his day with body language texting “I’M DONE FOR” (in all caps), be ready.

  • If your sweetheart’s preference is touch, give a lingering embrace.
  • If it’s time, sit quietly and listen.
  • If words, say you’re proud of him/her, and say it from your heart.

Meet their preference at that moment. Gently, intimately bring them through the rough patch.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you also credit the source.

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What’s Your Romantic Focus

For years I dreamt of touring full time with a Christian vocal band: creating sweet harmonies, seeing the joy we’d bring to thousands.

From college days to past my post-graduation diploma, I worked on my dream:

  • Weekend concerts and limited touring.
  • The routine: setup, rehearse, perform, chit-chat, teardown.
  • Another day, another venue.

Then I got my chance – full-time music.

But after two records and a cross-country tour, the dream ended quietly one December evening in Sarasota, Florida.

Fast forward several years.

Christmas was approaching. I’d stretched my finances to purchase a fire-opal pendant for my sweetheart’s crimson blouse. They’d sparkle together.

Eagerly I watched her open the box revealing the necklace.

Her reaction was tepid at best – disappointing to her and disheartening for me. Her thanks lacked her trademark Tigger bounce.

Maybe you’ve invested hours planning a Romantic Interlude for your sweetheart, putting your heart into buying this or arranging that. You anticipate an exuberant response and the creation of a special memory that’ll last for years.

But the forced smile signals failure.

If you find yourself with an outcome disappointing both of you, look for the lessons in the Interludes that don’t work. Understanding the lesson in failure means it’s not a failure but a steppingstone to success.

So consider this. You may suffer from what helped sink my dream.

I’ve realized one issue contributing to my failure was my focus. I was pursuing my dream, my vision. I didn’t think about the desires of others in the group. It became all about what I wanted.

Learn from my disappointment and ask yourself, “Was my focus on the Romantic Interlude I desired? Or was it centered on what my sweetheart desired?

Next Romantic Interlude you create, focus on your sweetheart’s preference. The results will much more satisfying for both

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you do so respectfully and credit the source.

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Refrigerator Love Notes

Do you have refrigerator word magnets, the kind that has over 300 random words spread out across the side of the fridge?

Use them to romance your sweetheart.

After your sweetheart goes to bed, or before he/she gets up, arrange a series of words into a message to your sweetheart. Point out something your sweetheart does which warms your heart. Put the message above the reach of little hands but in plain sight.

A day or two later, leave another message, maybe one to be found after work.

Over the next 2 weeks, leave random messages at arbitrary times. Watch for the resulting glow.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you use it respectfully and credit the source.

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My Cap Quest and Romance

Don’t remember how I came into possession of my old “captain’s” cap. Manufacturer’s tags are long departed. It’s comfortably worn. Colors’ faded, the top stained. But it has character. Someone once commented, “There’s gotta have a great story behind it.”

Last year, tragically, my cap met its match in Southeast Asia. Humidity, dust and the resulting sweat tattered the lining. Attempts to find someone to breathe life into it failed. I begrudgingly conceded it was time for a replacement.

With no clue as to the brand or style, the Cap Quest began.

  • Captain’s hats – too stuffy, fancy and no character.
  • Greek fisherman’s hats – too stiff and the wrong color.
  • Seaman’s caps – 533,000 results in 0.68 seconds but no match.

A captain’s cap like mine should be easy to find. But a multi- month search, my Cap Quest resulted in zero finds. Nothing in the world matched it.

Maybe you feel that way about romance – nothing seems to match your expectations.

Fortunately romancing your sweetheart isn’t as hopeless as my Cap Quest.

Romancing lessons from my Cap quest.

  1. Know what you want – how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced. A tingly touch? A little gift based on a shared memory?
  2. Evaluate your options against your romantic preference target. Your sweetheart may not enjoy a moonlit walk, but finds a poem heart-melting.
  3. Above all, persevere. Create the Romantic Interlude which best matches your sweetheart’s preference. And if doesn’t meet expectations, create another. And another.

Don’t let disappointing Interludes deter you. Persevere.

Creating a romantic moment, a Romantic Interlude that reminds your sweetheart why she/he fell in love with you takes dogged determination and persistence. And when you’re Romantic Quest triumphs, you’ll forget the disappointments of the quest.

After a year’s search, I found the only listing in the world for a canvas seaman’s cap from Abercrombie & Fitch.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

You’re welcome to quote from or share the contents of this blog provided you credit the source.

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