Romance Beyond February 14

Such sadness. Valentine’s over. Guess romance is done for another year.

Do you feel that way? Does your relationship go on a unromantic hunger strike the next 364 days? Is romance flatlining until it’s resurrected by this annual Hallmark holiday?

You can change that.

Kirk and Kim Duncan from 3 Key Elements and hosts of “Royalty and Romance” shared some insights into keeping Romance Alive beyond February 14.

First, speak to your sweetheart using words with deeper meanings, especially if your sweetheart prefers to be romanced with WORDS.

Flirtatious words, double-entendres or short phrases convey the uniqueness of our relationship with your sweetheart. These words can connect you at levels deeper than the regular “I love you’s”. If you’ll whisper these words, things amp up, like sharing a secret meant for only your sweetheart’s ears.

Second, touch your sweetheart and do it frequently, especially if your sweetheart prefers to be romanced with TOUCH.

Neck touches, ear kisses and shoulder rubs are romantic. They’re intimate, bringing you close physically and emotionally. The gentle brush of your skin against your sweetheart’s skin brings warm shivers. These touches are special, unique, and reserved only for the two of you.

Third, sway together. Let WORDS, TOUCH and TIME TOGETHER combine to revive romance.

Find a song you both enjoy. Sit close and gently rock/sway to the rhythm of the music – for the entire song. Let the music take you away, connecting you emotionally. Swaying together creates your world-for-two, excluding all others.

Keeping Romance Alive between February 15 and February 13 isn’t spontaneous generation, happening inexplicably and without design. It’s something deliberate, the result of your decision to keep Romance Alive. Use these suggestions to help your relationship.

Here’s to a happy February 15th and 16th and 17th and . . . and keeping Romance Alive 24/7/365. Robert

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Guess Where We’re Going For Dinner

Familiar with the conversation beginning with, “Where do you want to eat?” That question ruins a Romantic Interlude faster than ants at a picnic.

Modify the question.

Invite your sweetheart out for dinner. When asked, “Where we going?”, tell your sweetheart it’s a surprise.

Once you’re out of the driveway, tell your sweetheart he/she gets five guesses on where you’re going for dinner.

Whatever’s your sweetheart’s first guess is correct.

Act surprised your sweetheart was able to guess so easily. The “magic” is your sweetheart’s first guess is probably where he/she would really like to dine. Robert

Want more ideas for Romantic Interludes? You can get my ebook, A Year Of Romantic Interludes

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Valentine’s and Romance

For the next several days, we’ll be subjected to the siren calls of advertisements attempting to convince you this or that product will make your sweetheart swoon.

I’ve already seen/heard these touted as romantic:
• Shoes
• Light bulbs with speakers
• A printer

If nothing else, it’s great comedy.

Here’s my question for you. Is Valentine’s Day another opportunity to show your sweetheart how special he/she is to you? Or is Valentine’s another reminder of how much romance has faded from your relationship?

Whether your relationship is purring along like a Rolls Royce or needs an IV of Black Insomnia coffee from South Africa, Valentine’s Day reminds us that romance in our relationship is not something to take for granted.

One side of my Romance Triangle is Time. Keeping Romance Alive in your relationship requires an investment of time.

Investing time in your relationship shows your sweetheart you still value them, you still pay attention to her/him, they’re important to you.

One simple way to do this is by remembering important dates like a birthday, anniversary, first date, a weekend away or a memorable date night.

Make it meaningful by designing the commemoratory celebration in a romantic manner which focuses on your sweetheart’s preferred way of being romanced:
• Celebrate with 30 quiet minutes of undistracted reminiscing.
• Bring home flowers and candy.
• Snuggle up and describe your memory from this important date.

This party celebrates your sweetheart and your relationship in a meaningful way.

To keep the romantic fire burning, I’d suggest finding something each month to celebrate. And if you are prone to forgetfulness or easily distracted (squirrel), set a reminder on your device.

While Valentine’s Day may remind us annually that romance is important, the rest of the year you can create romantic celebrations which reminds your sweetheart what he/she means to you.

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Romance Can Be So Confusing

Do you find romance very confusing?

While doing online research into what people find romantic, I found the following answers to that question:
• Wear a suit, then give me the jacket.
• Some kind of physical touch would be nice.
• Pick me up and spin me around.
• A quiet evening in a quiet corner of a quiet restaurant.

The responses varied like naming the best dance tune of all times. Yet, there was a common cord binding each response to the next. What each person found romantic was more of a reflection on themselves then a conclusive definition of romance. Each person had their personal preference for what they found romantic.

Preferences is one side of the Romantic Triangle. It’s foundational to romance. Each of us has a preference on how we wish to be romanced.

The woman who wanted to have the jacket off her sweetheart’s back found a sharp dressed man attractive. And when he put his jacket across her shoulders, she was more connected to him.

The guy who found physical touch romantic feels the magnetic connection when his sweetheart’s hand touches his arm.

To lady wanting to be swept off her feet it reminded her of her sweetheart’s strength. Hercules and Prince Charming wrapped in one.

And the quiet evening was a simple plea to be given the gift of his sweetheart’s exclusive time.

Take to heart the inscription over the ancient Greek temple at Delphi, “Know Thyself”. Ask yourself, “What do I find romantic? How do I prefer to be romanced?”

Once you’ve discovered the clues leading to that answer and ascertained your preference, take the more important step. Ask thyself, “What is my sweetheart’s preferred way to be romanced?”

Determining the answer to that question will help you make your relationship great!

What do you find romantic? Robert

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Valentine’s, Romance and Commercials

I’m amazed at what people advertise and claim it has anything to do with Valentine’s

Valentine’s was created to honor the relationship you have with your sweetheart. It’s about romance and creating memories the two of you share with each other. Today I read an advert about being romantic with light bulbs which incorporate speakers. That’s romantic?

Another online advert proclaimed you needed technology to make Valentine’s romantic. The technology – a printer, additional memory, and on-and-on.

This leads me to ask. What is the dumbest Valentine’s advertisement you’ve seen or heard? What did they try to say would be romantic? Let me know what you’ve found.

I’d love to hear your (sarcastic) favorite. Robert

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Follow The String

Get one ball of string. Add a little gift for your sweetheart. Take a 100-yard walk, and you’ll have a Romantic Interlude.

Wrap one end of the string around the gift you picked out for your sweetheart. Conceal the string-wrapped gift, leaving the rest of the ball accessible to you.

Walk through the house, unwinding the string as you go. Create a string trail which meanders through the different rooms and levels of the house.

When you’ve completed your winding road, give your sweetheart the loose end of the string. Tell your sweetheart to follow the string path to the treasure.

Let me know if you try this and how it worked. Robert

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The Price of Romance

What is the price of romance?

My immediate reaction to that question, “It depends”.

It depends on what you think you must do to be romantic:
• Dinner and a romantic movie? $70 (without popcorn or a sitter).
• A piece of jewelry? $49.95 to thousands.
• A weekend in Paris….

Trouble with each idea, besides the expense, there’s no guarantee your sweetheart will find it romantic. Or, the sound of your sweetheart calculating how deeply in debt you’ll become diverts attention from enjoying the Romantic Interlude.

Before you give up on being romantic, consider this. There’s no mathematical correlation between the amount you spend romancing your sweetheart and how much its appreciated.

Spend a boatload of money and your sweetheart may feel romanced. Spend a tricycle-load and your sweetheart may feel romanced.

It’s not how much you spend that matters. It how you romance your sweetheart. And the best way to romance your sweetheart is how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced.

Consider my definition of romance:

Doing something to express affection to your sweetheart in a meaningful yet unexpected way, that creates special moments which enhances the relationship in a way unique between you, and leaves a special memory.”

A meaningful way is romancing your sweetheart how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced. Romancing how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced enhances the relationship. The result, a memorable Romantic Interlude.

Instead of investing in a traditional, extravagant, hope-it-is-romantic Interlude, invest in understanding how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced.

Each of these simple ideas can create a Romantic Interlude between you and your sweetheart:
• Quiet moments together;
• A lingering hug;
• A letter; or
• A silly teddy bear.

What’ll it be for you? Max out the credit cards? Or create a simple, meaningful, inexpensive hour romancing your sweetheart how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced? Your choice. Robert

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