Fear Is A Liar

It was probably one of the biggest challenges she’d ever faced. She deeply loved her sweetheart and wanted to romance him.

But she could feel the cold fingers of fear sending shivers across her back as she considered her plans. He might reject the Romantic Interlude she was creating for him, for them.

Have you ever felt that way? Have you wanted to create a Romantic Interlude and had that monster fear attack you? You expended time and energy thinking up this Interlude only to spend more energy facing down insidious fear?

This thing, this fear, these thoughts which are trying to dissuade you from following through, will do anything, including lie to you, to keep you from romancing your sweetheart.

A song I’ve been hearing addresses this. Let me share some of the words:

Fear, he is a liar
He will take your breath
Stop you in your steps
Fear he is a liar
He will rob your rest
Steal your happiness
Cast your fear in the fire
‘Cause fear he is a liar
(Jason Ingram / Zach Williams / Jonathan Lindley Smith, © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Essential Music Publishing)

How do you get beyond this fear of creating a Romantic Interlude? How do you put your plan into action?

Let me share some ideas.

First, realize fear is like a line of dominoes, each depends on the action of the previous domino. If any domino is stopped, the line stops.

Second, challenge the arguments fear is presenting. When fear is faced with facts, it begins to lose its steam, lose its momentum, lose its power.

Third, take a step despite the fear. Step through the fear. Then take another step. Action defeats fear.

When faced with the spectre of fear, instead of letting its lie deter you, take action and create that Romantic Interlude.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

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Recreate A Romantic Moment

Find a photo of the two of you taken during the first months of your relationship, a special one from the puppy-love years.

In this Interlude, you’ll recreate that photo.

Go back to the same location where the photo was taken. If you can’t get back there, that’s OK. This Romantic Interlude will still work.

Recreate the shot to the extent you are able. Strike the same pose, wear similar clothes, give the same smile.

Now, get a picture frame with places for two photos. Put both pictures into the frame. Give the filled frame to your sweetheart. It’s even better today than it was.

Where will you go to take that photo?

Robert, a hopeless romantic

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Ready. Aim . . . Don’t Stop There

The Sargent bellowed instructions to these new fish. To hear him, you’d think they’d never seen a gun or know which end to point at the target.

OK, you bunch of sorry losers. Let’s see if you can remember which end to point at that target” he barked, with all the expletives expected from someone in his position.

Ready . . . Aim . . .. Come on now, Let’s get it right!

Ready . . . Aim . . ..  Ready . . . Aim . . ..  Ready . . . Aim . . ..

Why don’t he just say FIRE!”, a couple recruits quietly muttered to themselves.

Investing time learning about romance, then devoting time to understand your sweetheart’s preferred way to be romanced is useless unless . . . you’re willing to take the next step – ACTION, side 3 to my Romance Triangle.

Sometimes a person will dedicate time to learn about romance, (Side 1) reading articles and books (like Growing Romance) to learn how to be romantic.

They learn romance is: Doing something to express affection to your sweetheart in a meaningful way, which creates special moments that uniquely enhance their relationship and leave special memories.

Then they’ll study their sweetheart, learning their preferred way of being romanced (Side 2), mentally creating the ideal Romantic Interlude.

Quitting at that point is like the failing Sargent who never gets the troops to “FIRE!”.

To make the Romantic Triangle complete and let romance make your relationship great, one must take ACTION (side 3). Turn theory into a deed, by creating a Romantic Interlude. Then another and another and so on.

Don’t get stuck between “Aim” and “FIRE!”.

What will you do before the end of this week to initiate the Romantic Interlude you’ve fashioned in your mind and truly romance your sweetheart?

Robert, a hopeless romantic

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What Would Be Your Book’s Title

Your life has been an interesting journey. You didn’t expect the detours, side bars and unexpected adventures you’ve experienced.

The same’s true for the relationship with your sweetheart. With a bit of talent, you could write a fascinating book.

Invite your sweetheart to join you for a book-writing meal. The topic of discussion, What would be the title of a book about our life together, and why?

After you’ve had a couple minutes to appease your hunger, reveal your book’s title and why you choose that title. Then it’s your sweetheart’s turn. Enjoy sharing the memories.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

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Romantic Preferences

Bert, in his elegantly tailored black tux, stood by the door, offering his hand as Jane exited the limo. Small sequins on her long, black dress twinkled as they entered Robert’s Romantic Rendezvous.

The maître d’ guided them to their window-side table adorned with 8 red roses. Over dinner they gazed at the moonlit sea. A magical, romantic evening.

The same evening, Chuck and Linda dropped off the kids with grandma, then headed to the grocery store for dinner’s ingredients. Returning home, they joked about eating without the agents of KAOS. They collaborated on dinner: spaghetti with pesto, garlic toast and ice cream sandwiches.

TV trays supported dinner while a free comedy entertained. Kicking off shoes, they snuggled. No one around to interrupt. Doesn’t get more romantic than that.

Which scenario is more romantic?

  • Dressing up, a limousine, moonlight and roses; or
  • Teaming up to fix dinner at home, just the two of you on the couch.

Both would qualify as romantic and yet you might not consider either romantic. Why, or why not?

The answer’s on the second side of my Romance Triangle.

TIME is side one. Side two is PREFERENCES.

Each of us has a preferred way of being romanced. For some, the first setting might be the very definition of romance. Some find a quiet evening, just the two of you quietly snuggling, to be the ideal Romantic Interlude. Others picture a different Interlude.

Your preferred way of being romanced is your romantic preference. Neither good or bad, right or wrong. It’s just your way, your preference. A Romantic Interlude for you is whatever you consider romantic.

Beyond knowing yours, learn what your sweetheart considers romantic.

Discover side 2 of the Romance Triangle. Discover yours, and, more importantly, your sweetheart’s PREFERENCE for being romanced. It’ll make your relationship great.

So, how do you prefer to be romance?

Robert, a hopeless romantic

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Sketchbook Romantic Interlude

I call this, a Romantic Interlude.

Does your sweetheart like to sketch, write down their thoughts or just doodle?

Find a hardcover, spiral-bound sketchbook or writing pad. Look for something nicer than your sweetheart would purchase for herself/himself. Make sure it’ll fold back so the full page is available for use.

Before giving it to your sweetheart, write a note on the first page about your caring and how you support him/her in this aspect of their life. Draw some hearts and other cutesy things. Add today’s date and sign.

Wrap it or put it in a gift bag. Invite your sweetheart out for a meal and present it.

Robert, a hopeless romantic

©Robert Beagle, 2018

 

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Simple, Romantic Ideas for Your Lady

I have no idea what to do for my sweetheart. Every “romantic” idea I come up with is either stupid or expensive.

H-E-L-P!

If you’ve ever found yourself in this situation, and you’re a guy, this Romantic Memo’s for you. Ladies can either take a pass on this week’s Memo or, if you’re curious, keep reading.

I did a bit of research and easily found three simple Romantic Interludes you can create without breaking the bank.

  1. What’s your sweetheart’s favorite morning beverage? The special drink she loves but won’t get for herself very often? Spoil her some morning.

After she’s left for work, head towards her office. On the way, stop by that coffee shop serving her favorite brew and buy her a cup to go. Deliver it to her at her workplace. I’ll bet she’ll light up when she sees you with “her” cup.

  1. Is there a light switch that needs replacing, a smoke detector battery that needs to be changed or a clogged drain? Do a home repair project for her.

Making a home repair for your sweetheart gets you noticed, even if you don’t break a sweat. It touches her and shows you’re there for her and want to take care of her.

  1. What’s your sweetheart’s favorite beverage or dessert? Is it a Riesling or maybe German Chocolate cupcakes?

Purchase this favorite treat and put it into the refrigerator or on the counter. Let her “discover” it. For extra “credit”, add a note like “A special delicacy for someone who makes my life more.”

While you might not think of any of these as very romantic, each is creative, thoughtful, and from what I’ve read, female approved.

What do you think, ladies? Do you find these ideas a bit romantic?

Robert, a hopeless romantic

©Robert Beagle, 2018

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