For many years, I proclaimed, “I am a spark plug”
I’d get things started, plant ideas, create great visions. And for a period of time I’d be very focused on an idea or project, pushing mightily with time and energy.
These great ideas usually puttered and stopped: a car safety invention, a movie theater promotion, a historic novel on the Intifada to name a few. I believed my “spark plug” talent was unique, highly valued and set me apart.
A “spark plug” talent isn’t unique, and
Being just a “spark plug” doesn’t equate to success.
I needed to develop a “flywheel” talent: someone who may not have the initial vision, but once given a task and the framework for reaching the goal, keeps going and going and going.
You’ve probably seen “spark plugs” before.
These “spark plugs” start a relationship with great enthusiasm, totally focused on the other person, devoting an amazing amount of time and energy to the relationship. Their financial and emotional investments are epic.
After a few weeks, the “spark plug’s” interest in the relationship wanes. Their focus waivers. They lose enthusiasm. The relationship soon disappears like a spent skyrocket.
Shortly thereafter, this “spark plug” chases a new relationship, only to repeat the same pattern.
If you’re serious about making your relationship great, it will require a long-term commitment, not a short-term sprint. A “Spark plug” or “flywheel” talent alone will result in stop-start romance or boredom.
Develop and use both talents. Never stop learning to be more romantic (“flywheel”) AND let new ideas continually ignite romance (“spark plug”). Robert