Time away from your sweetheart is inevitable in a mobile society. We’ve all experienced it. When asked about the truth of the proverb, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder,”
- Some might state an emphatic, “yes!”
- Others an unequivocal, “no!”
- A third group might respond with a definite, “maybe!”
What would you say?
No matter your answer, we’d probably agree that too much absence for too long a period of time can distort the relationship. Reunions seem exciting. Too much of that and a couple begins to expect all time together to match this reunification excitement.
Truth is, romance is built on small as well as big things. It’s created as part of the constant touching of two lives sharing the journey of life. It takes work to intentionally add romantic sparks to the “routine” of daily life.
If you’re separated for a period of time, how do you keep romantic expectations from becoming distorted, expecting the excitement of reunion to be the romantic routine?
- During separation, keep in frequent contact. It’s much easier today than what I experienced in a long-distance, high school romance when communications was restricted to snail mail and a rare phone call.
- When you talk, spend time talking about everyday life: a leaky faucet, lines at the grocery store, the cat’s antics.
- Use a portion of your conversation to express your feelings towards your sweetheart. Missing her/him? Say so. Looking forward to seeing your sweetheart again? Say so. Miss coffee together or watching your favorite shows together? Let your sweetheart know.
- Plan a small, special, so-glad-to-be-with-you something. Consider how your sweetheart prefers to be romanced and let that guide your mini-celebration.
Absence happens. Reunions happen. Everyday life happens. Make romance something you deliberately add to your relationship to keep your relationship, your romance alive. Robert